Not Many Answers

My heart and mind have been a bit overwhelmed with my health, lots happening but not alot of answers.

Psalms 55:2 NLT
[2] Please listen and answer me, for I am overwhelmed by my troubles.

https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.55.2.NLT

I had a follow up CT, on May 9th, which gave us a bit of a clearer picture of what is happening in my lungs, there are now several measurable nodules. Still very small but more definitive than January. Very likely cancer that has spread or a new cancer, but no one knows. This was very overwhelming for all of us as I didn’t have cancer in my lungs before, just my liver and bones. I felt a complete overwhelming sense of doom looming.

I was switched to a new oncologist, one that specializes in breast cancer, Dr.Davidson because my former oncologist no longer treats breast cancer patients. I saw Dr.Davidson through telehealth on May 28th. He brought a bit of peace and helped us to slow down and not panic.

I’m to continue my current cancer treatment until I have another CT (on July 9th) and he talks with my internist and rheumatologist. He told us, I have time for us to figure this out and make wise decisions about how to move forward. So we’ll know more mid July.

To add more to process, I saw my internist a week ago to go over several changes he made and to go over the stress test he had me do.

Earlier this spring I saw him for the first time for some shortness of breath I’d been experiencing. He questioned several things including some medications I was on and the health of my heart. As a result I stopped my main scleroderma medication, methotrexate. Began a new stomach med and a twice a day puffer. As a result my stomach issues have improved, until we went camping this past weekend, some bloating and vomiting returned. My shortness of breath greatly improved and I can walk a bit further than before. Lastly though, my stress test shows I’ve had a heart attack and mild congestive heart failure that needs treatment. So this week I’ve added two new heart medications with more to come as we see how well these are tolerated.

Having had a heart attack was a big surprise as I couldn’t recall a time it might of happened until we chatted and recalled a night in January where I had, what I thought, was massive heartburn. Pain, hard to breath, coughing. It calmed with my heartburn rescue med somewhat, but I was still uncomfortable most of the night. I guess we’ll never know for sure.

My hands have gotten worse, requiring an additional pain med and making it painful to use my scooter now. Still battling infection in my knuckles with several antibiotics.

James 5:15 NLT
[15] Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven.

https://bible.com/bible/116/jas.5.15.NLT

Life itself continues forward although I often ponder if this will be my “last”. My last summer, my last visit to certain places, the last birthday I’ll see. Trying to cherish each moment.

We had a beautiful family brunch together for Father’s Day celebrating our amazing son-in-law and two sons that are all the most amazing Father’s. I could watch them parent all day and love every second. They are the best! Also an amazing husband and Gramp’s that goes above and beyond for all of us. Working hard and then running everyone everywhere. He is so loved and appreciated more than words can say.

We had our 4th dear child graduate from college with honors. So proud of him. He has a beautiful future ahead of him!

The kid’s have been busy getting their 4-H projects ready for Achievement Day coming up.

We had our first camping trip this past weekend, celebrating our two oldest grandbabies birthdays. They are now 2yrs and 4yrs old!

Hot summer days are finally here but our pool has a leak. We’re hoping to find the hole or it will have to be replaced as it brings so much cooling joy and relief.

We also have our garden and greenhouse planted which bring so much yummy joy!