Today I sit in a hospital room, away from my family and home just for the purpose of receiving feeds. Life saving but extremely expensive feeds.
Psalms 42:5 NLT
[5] Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again— my Savior and God
https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.42.5.NLT
Because of my significant weight loss for many months now, down to 104lbs this week, the tough decision to have a permanent feeding tube placed was made. Three weeks ago I had surgery to place a G tube into my stomach. It went smoothly but my stomach muscles were very sore for two weeks. Two weeks after surgery I traveled to Halifax to have a J tube extended into my intestines through the G tube. This also went very well, no pain and we headed home the same day. The very next day I was admitted to hospital so my feeds could begin.
The cost of feeds and supplies is going to be nearly $3000 monthly. This is not an added expense our family can afford but it is not funded or covered by any government (or any other) department. So here I sit, having things covered while I take up an acute care bed fighting to find funding. It’s getting exhausting and so frustrating to fight for this. Please pray that God would show His favor and put this funding in place so I can be home with my family.
Joshua 1:9 NLT
[9] This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
https://bible.com/bible/116/jos.1.9.NLT
Feeds have been tricky to figure out. The type of feed has been well tolerated by me, thankfully but juggling the amount has been a daily adjustment. Yesterday was the first evening I’ve felt okay and was able to eat a little.
Thanks to many wonderful friends we’ve been making out okay but me being home again is definitely our ideal. We are living in a kind of survival mode which is exhausting.
1 John 4:19 NLT
[19] We love each other because he loved us first.
https://bible.com/bible/116/1jn.4.19.NLT
Our new addition is all finished aside from a couple of outside things. It is beautiful and so perfect. It’s taken a few days to adjust. It felt so weird not going upstairs to bed and having everything so new but having a bathroom right there, is a life changer.
Now we’re working on getting the two girl’s rooms upstairs all painted and refreshed. They all got new bed sets and wall stickers of their choice for Christmas so we’re excited to have those rooms all complete. They definitely love pink!
Please pray that funding would be approved this up coming week so I don’t have to continue being in hospital and can be home to love on my family again.
1 Corinthians 13:7 NLT
[7] Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
Through It All 
I will be praying for all these concerns. I amso very sorry that you are away from home and frustrated, I would be too. Please know you are so often in my heart. I love to think of Jesus and his deep compassion for those that are suffering. He cares, he knows. And He will never leave your side.
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